Autumn

I love autumn - until I look at my calendar and see days full of work and appointments!

My soul wants to shut out the busyness of September and perhaps it would if I were not able to get out and see the autumn leaves and feel the cool, settling air. There is stillness, decay, and death. But there is also a glimpse of hope - I gather perennial seeds and scatter them in new places hoping for the miracle of spring that will bring them to life.

Many years I have gathered autumn leaves - we all like to "gather" certain things in the hopes, perhaps, of somehow possessing them, or hanging on so we don't lose them.  Well, perhaps by painting these leaves I no longer need to gather.  I feel I am brushing and coaxing many colours and shapes into a memory of autumn.

A few quotes on autumn which cause me to ponder and which hold in them something truly profound about how we might experience this season:

Everyone must take time to sit and watch the leaves turn.
Elizabeth Lawrence

Delicious autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns.
George Eliot

I cannot endure to waste anything as precious as autumn sunshine by staying in the house. So I spend almost all the daylight hours in the open air.
Nathaniel Hawthorne

Autumn wins you best by this, its mute
Appeal to sympathy for its decay.
Robert Browning

Spring passes and one remembers one's innocence. Summer passes and one remembers one's exuberance. Autumn passes and one remembers one's reverence. Winter passes and one remembers one's perseverance.
Yoko Ono

A continuing exercise....

Renovations continue!!

 So it seems we are "almost done" our main floor renovations.  I say almost because the workers have come and gone and it's basically up to us now to finish it off!  Well, the fellow has not done the grout for the tiles but this is a job I will tackle with my sister's help next week.  Then there is the painting!  But we are moving along wall by wall and one of these days it will be complete.  

At least now we can feel like having people over for coffee or a barbeque as long as the weather is good and we can use the gazebo...[because the washroom is now useable]  and we are having a lovely summer and there is nothing more peaceful than sitting outside in a sheltered spot reading or chatting with a cup of coffee in hand. I'm really enjoying this summer!

our outdoor dining room

 

 Oh yes, must get the mirror up, the towel rack on and the curtains and pictures hung in the washroom!

And there are doors that have been taken off to paint that need to be put on... endless details it seems but we keep tackling them one at a time.  It has been a challenging and enlightening experience but overall I think we are ending up with a very harmonious and welcoming space that we hope to enjoy for the next 20 years!!

Calling forth creativity

I just read an very interesting review about a new book on creativity, called Imagine by Jonah Lehrer.  http://thestar.com.my/lifestyle/story.asp?file=/2012/4/17/lifebookshelf/11100560&sec=lifebookshelf

It affirms that our creative abilities originate in the right side of the brain, come to light when we are "at rest" or relaxing but are birthed with a great deal of effort.  Which does make sense to me.

This might be an interesting read but I'll just stay with the reviews for the moment as I already have a painting waiting for the 'hard work" on the easel and a stack of 8 books on my desk to peruse and a lot of mulling over to do for my next writing....:)

I like this quote in the review: ‘A good poem is never easy. It must be pulled out of us, like a splinter.’  Might need to think about the splinter part... I believe that creativity is somehow within us and even as we mull things over and over, eventually something calls it forth to be seen, heard, felt, and yes, well perhaps even sniffed.

But...  now for some hard work...

Raindrops

What a pleasant rain today....  we [Doug & I] were having afternoon coffee on the front porch of the gazebo when a simple bolt of lightning followed by a loud and prolonged roar of thunder resulted, not in a downpour but a gentle fall of rain.

The nasturtiums, which are growing in front of the gazebo, have leaves like lily pads which catch raindrops, resulting in a huge droplet forming in the center of the leaf.  It increases as small drops plop into it and eventually becomes too heavy and rolls gently off the leaf.  The droplets roll around and shake like a drop of mercury... they "shimmer" and show an intriguing, image of the leaf below them. I really enjoyed watching and finally took a few photos, several of which are included below.

I googled "raindrops" and found the incredibly relaxing Chopin's Raindrops on line.... you might like to take a five minute break and sit back, close your eyes and relax while listening to it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OcIMvliWM2I

Tenacious: “to hold fast”

Mid-summer, and because I am so thoroughly blessed by living in a peaceful place and ‘soon to be’ lovely house [renovations are reaching the end], and have a comfortable gazebo in which to eat and read and from which to gaze at the many surprises that our yard supplies – well need I actually say what I feel!  I just want to relax in this state for many more days!!

But I know that as soon as August 1^st comes round I will feel the pressure of yet-unplanned days and schedules and it will be more difficult to take the time to relax and observe.  I want to hold on to this time but more so, I think I want to hold fast to the quality of observation and depth of peace that I have been enjoying while I move ahead to autumn expectations.

There is something of value that the word tenacious, meaning “to hold fast” implies.  There is a reason for the tenacity, for the holding on to. There is a source that makes it possible.

What drew my mind to this word was my amaryllis plant.  Each spring, once the flowers fade, I cut off the flower stalk and baby it along until I can put it outside in a pot because I read that through the summer the leaves will take in what is needed to replenish the bulb so that it can be stored and will bloom again next year.  Well, this year the flowers were absolutely gorgeous and when I cut off the stalk I felt the bulb and it seemed there was nothing left!  Now in the way renovations go we were packing things away so finally, upon my husbands assertion that there is just no way that bulb is going to grow I finally tossed it in the compost.  Yes, I did!

Well, as I glanced at the compost from time to time I noticed that the leaves which had drooped began to perk up and several new leaves were beginning to grow. When I tugged at the plant thinking that perhaps I should plant it in the garden it had produced long roots which were firmly holding fast to the debris in the compost and to tug it out would have meant to rip the roots.  So I left it and we enjoy the beauty of bright green leaves reaching out of the compost.

I hold on – be that to what I observe of our plants, flowers and birds or to what comes from the compost heap.  I hold on to the beauty, the peace, the lessons of seeds – growth – fruit/flowers, of bird challenges and feedings, of weeds, of the feel of the slight breeze in the evening as we observe the clouds and wait for the light to fade, of the candlelight in the darkness.  I hold on to the realization that even when the soil is a bunch of grass clippings without fertilizer somehow it can produce incredibly healthy looking leaves.

I hold on – because in all of this there is a source that gives me life, that refreshes and restores my soul, that brings healing and offers hope for new growth.  Within God’s creation there is the source of life just as within God’s Word there is also the source of life – both essential to my well being. 

In our yard, which some may think of as a hodge podge of garden spaces, trees, and grass I have observed that plants grow out of tree bark and dead trees as well. The rains have caused these to flourish.  I love the miniature worlds they produce – their own little ‘secret gardens’ that are all part of the whole. 

These photos show some of the smaller places in our yard and some of the plants that are holding fast. 

at the base of the willow tree

in the stump of a willow tree which was cut down about 15 years ago

Natural Elements

Sometimes we do not know what we know until we touch – touching the truth with our minds alone is not enough – we are made to touch it with our bodies. And so as I touch stone, wood, glass, and clay I allow touch to teach me of God's creation.

In renovating the main floor of our house [it's not quite done yet!] it gradually occurred to me that we were being drawn to natural elements and when we could not afford the ‘real’ we opted for the man-made in a form as close to the original as possible.  For example, rather than a stone pebble floor in the washroom, which would be too heavy for our older house, we opted for a vinyl that “spoke pebbles” to us.  And pebbles in the washroom makes sense to me because that is where water is - where cleansing takes place – and on my more imaginative days it seems I am standing on the edge of a stream...

Through looking more carefully and touching contemplatively I rekindle my love of natural things.  I allow my senses time to pay attention, to ponder the feel and look of the elements - and in this way learn a greater reverence for God’s creation. And reverence happens when my senses move from taking things for granted to standing in awe of what God created.  Reverence is hard to define – but you know it when you feel it.

Paul Woodruff [Taylor, An Altar in the World] argues that true reverence cannot be for anything that human beings can make or manage by ourselves.  By definition, he says, “Reverence is the recognition of something greater than the self – something that is beyond human creation or control, that transcends full human understanding.” 

But, I believe that the path to reverence is ‘paved with the ordinary’ and it is the ordinary and even the modified that pushes us along the path to recognize and reverence God’s Creation. We begin with where we are – we touch, listen, see, & taste – and as we ponder these we may find ourselves standing in awe of that which is beyond human. 

The photos in this blog highlight the ‘natural elements’ and manmade materials that we have used to create a place of harmony that provides me with a pathway to creation.  A place were one can run a finger along the grain of wood, feel the smoothness of stone, the coolness of porcelain, watch the beauty of light as it passes through glass, clear or coloured, marvel at the diverse shades of slate the simply beauty of soapstone and marble.

Sabbath and the Practice of Saying 'No'

In Barbara Brown Taylor's book, An Altar in the World,  she reveals ways to discover the sacred in the small things we do and see by participating in various practices.  As we incorporate these practices into our daily lives, we begin to discover altars everywhere we go, in nearly everything we do.

'The Practice of Saying No' is the title of Chapter 8 and it is alternately called, Sabbath.  While it is easy and affirming to say 'Yes' it is much more difficult to say 'No' -  yet it is in saying no that we may finally become acquainted with the Holy.  Abrahan Heschel says that the first holy thing in all creation was not a people or a place but a day.  God made everything in creation and called it good; but when God rested on the seventh day, God called it holy.

Sabbath means rest, but it is not always easy, and just as we enter into a day of rest we may be confronted with compulsions, memories, resistance which hinders rather than brings life to our spirits.  Sometimes the practice of Sabbath, similar to holidays, must begin with shorter moments so that our bodies and minds can accommodate it without feeling ill or our of sorts.

Well I'm not going to go into a discussion on Sabbath as I believe we each need to find our own way into it.  For example, for myself, about every 7 months my soul grows weary and I know it is time to take at least a Three-day Silent Retreat.  The weekly practice of Sabbath is essential and I find I crave it more and more, and especially after an intense week. This evening I am finding it particularly inviting as I've finished a painting that has taken several weeks. When a painting is finished I'm exhausted!

To conclude, a final quote from Barbara Brown Taylor on Sabbath.  "The ancient wisdom of the Sabbath commandment - and of the Christian gospel as well - is that there is no saying yes to God without saying no to God's rivals....  Your day begins when you let God hold you because you do not have the slightest idea how to hold yourself - when you let God raise you up - when you consent to rest to show you get the point, since that is the last thing you would do if you were running the show yourself.  When you live in God your day begins when you lose yourself long enough for God to find you and when God finds you, to lose yourself again in praise."